sigh

May. 14th, 2012 05:16 pm
noblescientist: (blog on)
So, you know how every so once in a while, something happens, or somebody says something, and it doesn't seem to mean anything to them, but it rubs you the wrong way in such a manner that makes you want to scream?

Yeah.

I'm there.

I'll post about this once it makes sense in my head-- or at least once I talk to my aunt. Let's just put it this way: things don't look good.
noblescientist: (owl)
But to everybody, really. Take this as a chance, an excuse, an extra reason to celebrate the women in your life.

All the rest is "personal", so I'm putting it under a cut so you don't have to read it.

Read more... )
noblescientist: (Methos)
I've been bored all week. Just bored. So yesterday I decided I'd go out to karaoke again, and completely over-dressed for it because I didn't have any clean jeans. (The dryer's busted.) I had on a Tripp halter corset from Caitlin-- it had been hers, but she seldom wore it-- and a denim skirt over my new boots-- photo on Facebook-- and nine bangles each wrist. Way over-dressed.
The girls I'd met the first time I went to Celtica were there again-- Amy, Shannon, and Rebecca, along with Shannon's beau, whose name, I believe, was Sean. I also met two lovely girls named Victoria (again, I think-- hard to hear in a populated karaoke bar) and Laura. (She stared at me all night. I'm not sure if she was just spacing or really staring, because I was trying not to unnerve her by staring back.) And Mark, who spent the night flirting with me.

I sang "Set Fire to the Rain" by Adele, then sang "Last Friday Night" by Katy Perry and "Love Shack" by the B52s with the girls. (Various stares and attempts at flirting were ignored, except one exceptionally persistent and somewhat polite one-- being Mark-- whom I allowed to buy me a Sprite. I should probably have felt bad; I realised at the end of the night that I'd sort of been leading him on.)

And then something odd happened. I was leaning up against the table our crew had usurped, my back to the bar, and I felt somebody's hands on my sides. I thought it was Shannon-- the only girl in our crew I couldn't see in my periphery-- and after starting a bit from the contact, turned around. It was a woman I'd never seen before in my life-- very tall, strawberry blonde, with a fairly attractive face and light eyes.
"I really like this-- sorry, don't worry, I'm not a lesbian!" (Here she removed her hands like I'd been angry, which I wasn't-- just a little bit alarmed. I wondered if she was drunk.)
"Thanks."
And then she seemed to see my face. "Oh my god, you're so beautiful! Are you single?"
"Erm, yes?" She told me again that I was beautiful before walking away, and I thought maybe that was the end of it.

And then she dragged over a friend of hers. "Isn't she beautiful?"
I decided she was completely plastered.
"Yes, absolutely," her friend agreed. "Sorry, I'm Diego."
"I'm Eva, hi."
We shook hands and he sort of led the woman off-- only for her to return again!
"So how about a kind of short guy-- not all that attractive-- but he makes a lot of money!"
I basically told her that so long as he wasn't expecting much, sure! I'm asexual. She walked away again, and I think she was trying to convince another guy to come see me, but failed. The next time she walked over, she assured me "we'll find you a boyfriend," as if being single was some sort of travesty. I just told her I was singing next ("Oh my god, shut up!") and went up to sing "Lithium" by Evanescence-- and rather more successfully than I would have expected, considering I'm getting over a cold-- and gained some groupies, I think. More flirting ensued, and Mark redoubled his efforts. I made no promises. *shrug*

The flirting, I'm used to; the staring, I'm used to; the brushing-by-entirely-too-close-for-comfort, I'm unfortunately also used to-- which does not mean I wasn't ticked--; being flirted with by a woman for her male friends? Not used to that. It was amusing.
noblescientist: (BBC Sherlock)
Well, my multiple trains of thought (I really need to find a better phrasing for that) are hindering my ability to read a particularly interesting fanfiction at the moment. And there is radio silence on both Facebook and Twitter, as well as Skype (because I seldom initiate Skype conversations), and it's far too late-- early?-- to be texting someone. Particularly the person I would most like to be texting, because this person values their sleep.

So I'll jump into that analysis I mentioned earlier. This is NOT an analysis of Sherlock Holmes in general; I'm focussing on some traits of specifically the BBC's Sherlock.
First of all, several people on the communities I watch-- friends' tumblrs, mostly-- have dismissed Sherlock's claim of being "a high-functioning sociopath" because he cares for John. Because of the obvious depth of that care, I made the mistake of making a similar comment myself before realising how stupid and contradictory I sounded.
Guess what, people? In that respect, sociopathy means absolutely nada. In fact, it actually explains some things.
First of all, sociopaths have the capacity to care. They will often become close to a small group of people with whom they can somewhat identify (and, more importantly, who can put up with them). With regards to these people, they will have a certain degree of empathy, and if they do something that upsets these people, they are likely to feel remorse. This is not true of psychopaths, who basically feel no emotion, but may fake them.
Second of all, some have pointed out Sherlock's apparent disinterest in any sort of sexual endeavours as odd, and then cited their disbelief of his claimed sociopathy. In reality, sociopathy could possibly explain part of that; some medical professionals believe that sociopathy is a subdivision of antisocial personality disorder, one of the traits of which can sometimes be a reduced sex drive. (Or, evidently, an unusually high one. Confusing, that.)

And about eighty per cent of the fandom seems to be debating the poor man's sexuality, something he probably wouldn't care to even define. While I'm analysing, though, I figure I may as well touch on the point; I'm interested in the subject, so why not?
One thing that is abundantly obvious after A Scandal in Belgravia-- dammit, almost typed Bohemia because of the original, lol-- is that he's a masochist. The look on his face when Irene Adler offers to "try" to "cut [herself] slapping that face" is rather telling, as is his reaction when she ends up beating her phone out of his grip. Trust me, I recognise reactions like those; I'm a masochist myself.
Now here's where it gets fuzzy. A marked disinterest in anything sexual-- excluding, of course, getting smacked around by Irene Adler, as it was not quite voluntary-- could mean that he's asexual. His reactions to Adler somewhat support this; he was busy checking her pulse in their most "intimate" scene, which led to later deductions. However, because he not only allowed her proximity, but repeated it when explaining his deduction, the line begins to blur. He may have been doing this to prove a point; he may have been doing it because she's attractive to him. (Her nudity certainly distracted him somewhat, and he was a bit eager to please her.) So, not likely to be completely asexual. Perhaps a repressed form of some other sexuality (likely demisexual), though which one is difficult to say for certain; there are many subdivisions, and not much to go on because he is repressed. One has to look closely for much of any hint in that direction, and most fans are squinting to see what they want. (I think it was deliberately left ambiguous.)

There, I've given it as much thought as I believe is due. Now for something that amuses me endlessly:
You are a high functioning sociopath
This was a result I just got from an on-line quiz. Just for kicks and giggles, I assure you; while researching to try to affirm this entry, I ran across the quiz, and it was short. I've been called a psychopath in the past, as well as a sociopath once or twice by my more educated enemies (normal people don't have enemies *cough misquote cough*), and then I end up designated as precisely what Sherlock calls himself. I had been trying to avoid comparing myself to him, but I think I'm over it. It's just funny now, and a bit uncanny in some ways.
noblescientist: (Dante)
So I noticed something. Condensed version:

The stereotype is that men have "measuring contests" in the toilet. The reality is, women do it too-- and not just in the bathroom. Women look at other women wherever they go-- whether it is only to appreciate beauty, like I do, or more commonly, to size up the competition, which (obviously) happens more often out in public and is just as bad as the male equivalent, if not worse. Frankly, I am sick of being "sized up" just because I'm female, or because I'm attractive. Statistically, it's extremely unlikely that I want the same thing you do. I'm not going to take that pretty girl or hot guy away from you because frankly, I'm not interested. I do not want to go have sex or babies or marriage, in that or any order; none of these things interest me in the least. Even if they did, looking me over wouldn't give you an advantage.

(How revolutionary, a TL;DR at the beginning of the post. This is because that was going to be a Facebook status until it got too long. Here's the rest.)


The rest. )
noblescientist: (Ritsuka)
Yeah, this is kind of related to the Badass Uke and Flaming Uke quiz results.

So this is me: I'm a lesbian, I'm apparently badass (which, by the way, is the aim), I'm quite masochistic, and I'm a wicked femme. (So the Badass Uke result fits like a glove.)

Switching gears here, this is the vibe I apparently give off: "you don't really strike me as a lesbian, you just seem like the 'strong independent woman' type."

Uh-huh. So, how, exactly, does one give off a lesbian vibe, while retaining the badass quality? I wish I knew. If I did, I'd do it.


It gets a little personal-- read if you want. )

So, if anybody has any advice for how to make myself a little more obvious, I'll take it into consideration. I'm far from being in the closet, but I can't seem to figure out how to shake off this "straight" image.

Advice is welcome!

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